I'm on an island. I'm on a missions base with some important ladies and gentleman. I'm in a place of beauty with salty ocean waves, roaring and crashing. I'm one of seventy-something students in a school about fire and fragrance. God is an all-consuming fire and we His disciples are the fragrance of who He is. So I smell like He is? Yessum.
I also smell sweaty. I like the fact that I walk to the dining room, to the prayer room, to class, to the shore. I like to sweat. I like to watch the ocean waves and think about how God's voice sounds like those roaring waves. I can hear His voice, but I also see that I move His heart. I gaze on His beauty.
Friday evening I was in the prayer room as it was full of DTS staff students. We were having a 24-hour session that we refer to as a "burn". Most people did not stay for the full twenty-four hours but a few did. I saw a picture of Jesus sitting at the right hand of the Father. He was talking to some angels and it seemed like it was a matter of importance. He stopped suddenly and closed His eyes. I could see that He felt something inside of Him, in His heart. His heart was stirring and He smiled. "It's Sarah" he whispered. He listens and He continues smiling.
In my heart I whispered, "You are holy Jesus."
He whispers back,"And you are holy"
"You are mighty Jesus."
"And you are strong."
He smiles and turns to the Father and they laugh together. So that's what David meant when God delights in us. God delights in me and I saw and faintly felt the Holy Spirit twirling inside of me. This is the trinity, my God. It's a dance of love and friendship and for a moment I was caught up in it. I smiled and Jesus smiled. "I'm not just glancing at You, I'm gazing at You. We're all gazing at You." He smiles a smile that speaks of such deep joy, but no combination of facial features could come together and form an expression that could sufficiently show His heart.
That's why there's the ocean. His heart is deeper than the deepest ocean. His heart speaks of His emotions toward us. mmmm... there's no way anyone could ever take this in, we can only sink or swim or both. But we don't just swim alongside the angels. We have our own reservoir of living water within us and His deep calls out to our deep. And what if there's also no end to the depth inside of us... the depth of the impact of His affections for us? We are eternal beings.
Andy Byrd, the school leader, spoke to us the first week of the DTS. He mentioned that he'd love to have lots of children because they are beings that he helped create and they will live forever. We humans are remarkable. I've been thinking about how surreal it is that I am a human being, breathing air, talking to the living God, destined to live forever. There are some important people on this planet and then there's all of humanity. But the crazy thing about this whole of humanity is that each one was carefully lovingly fearfully crafted by God who had a dream in His heart for each one. This God is something else, in fact He is holy, unlike anyone else. He loves us ya'll. How does one respond? One could learn how to swim or one could learn how to sink.